The Room: You’re tearing me apart, Lisa

I had the immense pleasure of seeing “The Room” a few nights ago at The Little for their new “Mondo Mondays” series. I have never had more fun, or seen so many people together having fun as in that room on Monday night. I had planned on saying that you shouldn’t bother to see this, but I’ve changed my mind. This is a “must see” if for no other reason than to establish a baseline for rock bottom. At worst, you’ll have wasted 90 minutes of your life. At best, well you’ve still wasted 90 minutes of your life but you probably laughed a bit along the way.

This new series is a fantastic idea and there were more people at this showing than ANY time I’ve ever been to the little. For a long time I’ve wondered why the people at The Little don’t engage more with a younger audience. I forgot to put on my “suggestion card” but they should have cheap beer for sale in red solo cups; especially for “Mondo Mondays”. The premise behind the Mondo Monday series is that they are showing movies “so bad they’re good”.

With that in mind, many consider The Room to be one of the worst movies of all time. Some amusing reviews include phrases like “dynasty of dung,” and “the Citizen Kane of bad movies.” With little knowledge of the film, I headed to the theater eager and excited. The first scene really sets the tone of the movie, when a burly man made sweet whale love to a woman wearing a garbage bag (turned out to be a dress). The scene lasted for what felt like an eternity. I kid you not; it was a full 4 or 5 minutes of this sweet whale love replete with bad jazz and strange angles. This scene was not relevant to the film but I could say the same thing about most of the scenes.

There were many little “gem” moments in the film. Every time the character Mark walks in someone exclaims, “Oh, Hi Mark”. They utter this pithy phrase with the same level of enthusiasm that you get from the people who work at Moe’s in Clark’s Summit, PA. Another gem was the framed photos of spoons on the table. They went out, bought frames, and didn’t bother to change the placeholder image (spoons). Instead of normal things in the frame, like family photos, they left pictures of spoons decorating the room. A final amusing part of the film was the re-use of shots such as the Golden Gate Bridge, a sex scene and trolley’s going up and down the street.

Some lines of dialogue from the film include:

 

Mark: How was work today?

Johnny: Oh, pretty good. We got a new client and the bank will make a lot of money.

Mark: What client?

Johnny: I cannot tell you; it’s confidential.

Mark: Aw, come on. Why not?

Johnny: No, I can’t. Anyway, how is your sex life?

And:

Johnny: Thank you, honey, this is a beautiful party! You invited all my friends. Good thinking!

From the moment the opening credits rolled, I was giggling like an idiot at what I was witnessing. The fact that someone poured SIX MILLION dollars into this film is remarkable. After doing some research for this post I read that many people believe that the movie was part of a money-laundering scheme. There are so many amusing anecdotes about the making of the room that one could spend hours reading about it. Suffice to say, there is more drama regarding the making of the film than there ever should be. The Room is one of those events in life that are so terrible that they require multiple films before the truth comes out. There is a film in the works by Point Grey Pictures called, “The Disaster Artist.” This film will chronicle Greg Sestero’s role in the film.

For those who are interested in seeing more of The Room Tommy Wiseau is on a tour called, “Love is BLIND”. The Room will live on delighting audiences for generations to come. It will be shown in college film classes and discussed to death; it is a true classic in cinema.

 

 

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